Ask Alison Winter 2011

My experiences as a relationship therapist are teaching me that just when I think I’ve got something sorted, along comes another situation that throws me! With this in mind, I’m always on the look out for simple tools to use with my clients that will help them bring about the understanding and outcomes they seek.

I recently attended a workshop by one of the country’s leading experts on relationships. He talked about his ‘Change equation’ that he uses with his couples work. I found it very simple and easy to use and am already seeing positive results. So here it is

Change =
A comittment to experimenting with difference
+ Action
+ Repetition
+ Time

So many of us want change without doing anything differently. Often we want our partners to change whilst we do nothing. I once heard some one say ‘Insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results’. So if you want a difference in your relationship why not try using this equation and see what happens. If you don’t you’re likely to get the same results as you’ve always got! Don’t be insane, change!!!

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