Ask Alison

29.4.09

Having problems with your relationship? Ever wondered why a bloke can’t be more like a woman? Life would be so much simpler if they thought like us girls wouldn’t it? Unfortunately they can’t and even if they did, life would be dull and boring!

My name is Alison Tinsley and I’m a Coach, Image Consultant and Author.
‘Ask Alison’ is an opportunity to give your marriage a new leash of life. Each month I’ll be giving tips and advice on how to make your marriage more enjoyable, rewarding and definitely a lot more fun. With a blend of understanding, a spoonful of extra thought and a pinch of spice, a tired and routine marriage can be revitalised.

Do send in your questions and I’ll do my best to give a positive and proactive response. I’m not interested in complaints about hubby though. I will help YOU face your concerns so you can learn to become the change you wish to see. You cannot control what happens to you but you can control how you respond. Sounds a challenge doesn’t it? If you’re up for it send me your questions, the rewards are so worth it, as are you.

Alison’s April Tip:

A phrase which seems to be increasingly used is this ‘I don’t think I love him anymore, the feeling’s just not there.’

Sound familiar? If this is you then take action immediately. Danger lies ahead. Hollywood, the soaps and the media lead us to believe that love is only a feeling. More importantly, that we have no choice in how we feel towards our partner. In other words, we can only react to our husband according to the way we feel.

But hold on a minute, this isn’t right. If you believe that then you’ve been hoodwinked! I know we all want Richard Gere to turn up in his limousine and rescue us, as if we’re living in a scene from pretty Woman. But you’re not Julia Roberts and hubby dear isn’t a Hollywood movie star!

Here’s the good news, and it’s even better than watching it on a cinema screen. If you become proactive and turn love into a verb, a doing word, then anything is possible. See just how much you can love your husband by acts of kindness or showing grace when he messes up. It is entirely possible for the feeling of love to be recaptured when you bring your own emotions into line by choosing to act with love towards your husband. If you believe in marriage, work on becoming more proactive. Make love a doing word.

Looking forward to hearing from you,

Alison x

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