January 2010

I Hold Up My Life to You Now

Patient God,
the clock struck midnight and I partied with a strange sadness in my heart,
confusion in my mind.

Now, I ask you to gather me,
for I realise the storms of time have scattered me,
the furies of the year past have driven me,
many sorrows have scarred me,
many accomplishments have disappointed me,
much activity has wearied me,
and fear has spooked me into a hundred hiding places,
one of which is pretended gaiety.

I’m sick of a string of “nice days.”
What I want is passionate days,
wondrous days,
dangerous days,
blessed days,
surprising days.

What I want is you!

Patient God, I hold up my life to you now,
as much as I can,
as high as I can,
in this mysterious reach called prayer.

Help me not to let my life slip away from me.
Come close, lest I wobble and fall short.
It is not days or years I seek from you,
not infinity and enormity,
but small things and moments of awareness,
awareness that you are in what I am
and in what I have been indifferent to.

It is not new time I seek,
but new eyes,
a new heart,
and you, always you.

Oh Patient God,
make something new in me,
in this year,
for you, for others,
for the abundance of this life lived in your presence.

‘I Hold Up My Life to you Now’ by Rev. Ted Loder

Adapted from Ted Loder, Guerrillas of Grace: Prayers for the Battle,
Innisfree Press, Inc. 1984.

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January 2010 Devotional – ‘I Am the New Year’

As the Christmas decorations are taken down we may ponder on another year ahead, embarking on new beginnings and resolutions with Jesus as our guide…

I am the New Year.
I am an unspoiled page in your book of time.

I am your next chance at the art of living.
I am your opportunity to practice what you have learned about life during the last twelve months.

All that you sought and didn’t find is hidden in me, waiting for you to search it but with more determination.

All the good that you tried for and didn’t achieve is mine to grant when you have fewer conflicting desires.

All that you dreamed but didn’t dare to do, all that you hoped but did not will, all the faith that you claimed but did not have – these slumber lightly, waiting to be awakened by the touch of a strong purpose.

I am your opportunity to renew your allegiance to Him who said, “Behold, I make all things new”.

‘I Am the New Year’ from the Bible Illustrator

A New Year prayer

Lord Jesus
May this new year be a time of spiritual growth, a time of welcoming your graces and gifts. A time for forgiving freely and unconditionally increasing virtue and goodness for your Glory.

Amen.

Happy New Year! X

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